Hummus Porn For Your Sunday Afternoon (Taken by me)

Trader Joe's Roasted Garlic Hummus Review

Tub Size: 7 oz
Price: $1.99
Dippers: Kirkland Tortilla Strips, Pita Bite Crackers, Carrots

I have to say I have a soft spot for Trader Joe's hummus. The majority of hummi that I've consumed from TJ's are delicious. Shout out to Trader Joe's for sticking with me through the good and the hummiserable.

The Roasted Garlic variety was no exception. Most traditional garlic hummi tend to be very garlicky. To the point that it overpowers the flavor of the chickpeas and tahini. This hummus has a very good garlic to garbanzo (G/G) ratio.

It is surprisingly thick though. A few of my tortilla chips fell victim to the hummus's grip and broke whilst scooping. I had to get my hands dirty and dig in deep on multiple occasions. It was the most masculine I have felt in weeks, having to work for every tidbit of hummus remnants in that feisty 7 ounce tub.

The appearance of the hummus leaves much to be desired. There were cliffs and valleys forming throughout consumption that made me question it's hummakeup.
It looks like quicksand, and from everything I've

hummus plateaus and glaciers

heard about quicksand, seems to have about the same viscosity.

But whatever the hummus lacks in appearance, it makes up for in taste. If there happened to be a marsh filled with Trader Joe's Roasted Garlic Hummus instead of quicksand, I would delight in jumping in. While thick and flavorful, the hummus somehow keeps me coming back for more. Traditionally, its hard to consume a lot of a thick hummus because of its density and richness. I ate this tub in two sittings. (Granted one of those I was severely intoxicated. But still... two sittings) The flavors meld in your mouth and dissolve on the tongue beautifully.

Trader Joe's has done it again. I only buy 2 things from the store. Hummus and dippers... Yet I make the drive out just for that. That's a testament to my dedication to the hummus game and this wonderful store. Overall, I give this hummus a 4 out of 5 chickpeas. Although thick, it tastes great (whether drunk or not).

Costco Trips and Hummus Surprises

I was lucky enough to accompany my mother on a Costco trip last night, which for me is basically like Christmas. "Hey mom, we need chips". "Okay honey" *throws bag of chips large enough for small country into cart*. "I could use some razors, too" *slowly reaches for 10 pack of Gillette Fusions* "Okay honey" Etc...

LOOK AT THAT SHIT!

This was exactly what happened with hummus. I was walking through the fridge aisles when the hummus caught my eye. But not a standard tub of hummus, NO. I'm talking 20 individually wrapped hummini tubs of classic hummus. 20! It was the cutest packaging I have ever seen. This means that I can have 20 straight lunches with hummus, without having to bring in a tub that my greedy coworkers will inevitably steal. It also means I can control myself and have a portion of hummus each day, without fiending and devouring half the tub in one sitting like usual.

Needless to say these little suckers seemed like the perfect fit.

Now for the review of the product.



Hommus Organic Classic

Size: 2.4 oz mini
Price: Idk my mom paid
Dippers: Stacy's Naked "Nothing But Salt" Pita Chips

This is a solid hummus. It's got a good creaminess to it, and a solid body. It's flavorful, but not overpowering. The only complaint I have is that it is a little tart for me (probably due to lemon juice). I think a little added salt could minimize the tart aspect, but still good.

I gotta say, though, the cute factor is really coming into play here. This little mini tub is frickin' adorable. You could put dog shit into this container and I would probably still think it was pretty cool. Eating it was like eating a little baby... but a creamy, delicious baby, minus the whole being a tiny human thing too, ya know. So as I am trying not to be biased, the packaging could be swaying me.

As far as classic hummus goes, I'm not the biggest fan. I'm more inclined to buy a flavored hummus, because my taste buds call for more. I'm not the type of guy to order "plain" anything, let alone one of my favorite foods. So, don't get me wrong it's a decent hummus, it's not some run of the mill Sabra.

Overall I'd give it a 3.5 out of 5 chickpeas.

This was me today... I will not become one of them!

Hummus Intruder Alert

So I get home from college and this guy is ruining the Hummus game. I went out of my way to get my favorite hummus, as most of you know (Trader Joe's Mediterranean) and bring it home and THIS GUY is chomping it down in all the wrong ways. There is a system when you eat this hummus. It comes with a reservoir of oil on the top that makes is delectable, yet my dad seems to think that the oil is all his. With every bite he takes goes another succulent section of the oil, and with it my hopes for an amazing tub of hummus. I can't stress enough how frustrating this is to me, and should be to all hummus lovers out there. My mother eats it perfectly fine, conserving the oil for maximum humjoyment. She takes direction well. MY father on the other hand stubbornly consumes whatever he wants, as if challenging my hummus authority. Let me tell you big guy. I am the Hummalpha in this household, and no one is going to take that away from me!

LISTEN- When you eat Trader Joe's Mediterranean Hummus you don't eat the oil until the end. You avoid it completely... like a person with the plague... Or a guy dressed as Santa Claus when it's not even close to Christmas. STAY AWAY FROM THE OIL PEOPLE! You save it until the end for the last quarter or so of the tub to be the best you've ever had.

Just thought I would update everyone. Keep on enjoying your hummus gang. 

What A Pleasant Surprise

The ultimate hummus dipper combined with the ultimate hummus! What a great find today in my bag of Trader Joe's Pita Bite Crackers!

Trader Joe's Mediterranean Hummus Review

I want to start by saying that I have been delaying this post for a while, I feel terrible about my lack of hummunication. I am deeply sorry to all of hummustsee's supporters (basically 1 or 2 people).

Now for the review!

Tub Size: 16 oz
Price: $3.99
Dipping Ingredients: White Cheddar Cheez it Grooves, Pita Bite Crackers. Carrots, Scoops from my hands and fingers

I have never tasted a hummus this good in my life. Trader Joe's Mediterranean Hummus has been my go to for the last 2 months, and is taking on a significant role in my life. There's a bunch of orange oil on the top of the hummus that I save for as long as I can because it is so delicious. This means that I work around the oil and form hummus craters throughout the tub to make the oil last until the end (a fairly difficult task). The hummus is creamy, savory, a touch tart, and more sultry than I'd like to admit. My roommates have actually started buying it as well which can lead to conflicts on whose tub is whose (those bastards). But thats what this hummus has an ability to do. TO RECRUIT NEW PEOPLE. It has a voice of its own which normally speaks to me in low, sensual tones, asking me to eat it slowly and with care. A demand I am more than willing to abide by. I give this hummus 4.5 chickpeas out of 5. I cannot give it a full 5 because I know that even I have a lot to learn in the hummus game. Stay tuned my friends.