Buffalo Hummus: The Only Thing More Disappointing Than Buffalo Bills

Buffalo wings are one of the few things Buffalo, New York is good for. (As of yesterday, clearly football is not one of them. Sorry Bills fans.) They're tangy, zesty, and all-around delicious. So when I saw Trader Joe's new Buffalo Style Hummus hit the shelves, I was pretty excited to give it a try... but boy was I blindsided.

Tub size: 8 oz
Price: $3.99
Dippers: Stacy's Garlic and Parmesan Pita Chips, Crazy Hot Pop Chips, baby carrots

From my very first interaction with this hummus, I was lied to. The label makes a lofty claim it's "smooth and creamy." False. More like "lumpy and runny." The texture falls somewhere between baby food and low-fat cottage cheese, which is as unappetizing as it is difficult to scoop.

Whatchu gon do with all those
 lumps inside yo hump?

The taste left just as much to be desired. Despite being made from organic ingredients, Buffalo "Style" Hummus has a notably fake taste, like cough syrup or an energy drink—which is fitting, because I could have used a burst of energy and an aspirin after just a few bites. There's also a weird cheesy quality to the dip. Maybe it's because I'm used to dipping Buffalo wings in blue cheese, or because it's bright orange. Whatever the case, it threw me off.

The worst part? I brought some serious firepower with my dippers. Stacy's garlic and parm pita chips and Crazy Hot Pop Chips are upper-tier snacks, but dipping them into such a mess was like wearing Gucci shoes with Old Navy jeans. It just doesn't work (not that I'd ever be caught dead wearing Old Navy).

Bills QB Josh Allen after his first bite

Through it all, I've realized two things.

First: Buffalo sauce is not a good enough flavor on its own. Unless you're slathering it onto a wing while watching football, it's gonna let you down.

Second: The Buffalo Bills will always let you down, especially when you're betting on them. Thanks for nothing.

Overall, this pretender of a hummus gets a dismal 1.5 chickpeas out of 5. Better luck next year, champ.